Neither rain nor sleet nor snow will get me to run

The leg exercises are working. Don’t get me wrong, I’m still having trouble, but the neat little rehab routine I designed is definitely working. In yesterday morning’s spin I was feeling a muscle spasm toward the end, but after hitting the leg machines, working out on the mat doing hip exercises, working with the exercise balls and weights it eased right up. (I won’t lie; a long steam helped.)

This is of course all good news, except the fact that our lovely Mid-Atlantic warm autumn is turning into actual winter weather. Where last week I might have been able to run outside in the comfortable 60-degree weather, this week it’s been nothing but rain and mid-40-degree temps, which brings me to my point: I guess I’m not a real runner: at least not in the sense the people who call themselves Real Runners.

Matt ran early Wednesday morning in the pouring rain, came home and boasted about how much fun it was (weee diddle for him, that boy would run in a riot). I didn’t even walk to the gym Wednesday because of the rain. This morning he ran while it is 39-degrees outside and in the kitchen he smugly mentioned how he was the only one out there.  “This is the weather that tells you who the amateurs are,” he said to me with a grin. Well slap me with a pickle and call me guilty, I’m an Amateur. It’s like I have to go to a Runner’s Anonymous meeting. “Hi, my name is Jeanne-Michele and I’m an amateur runner. It’s been two months since my last run and it’s probably six more before I go again.” And then I hold my head low and cry in embarrassment.

But this is where I get pissed off. I’m not a weak person. I can lift a decent amount of weight (in some cases more than some guys), I can do pushups on the Bosu ball with ease and I walk 6 miles a day (generally) in any weather (I ran the 13.1 miles for Christ’s sake!) but running in inclement weather? You have got to be kidding me. No way in hell I’m running in rain or snow or cold. What am I the Post Office? I won’t lie, I always bitch when I have to walk in that stuff. Yup, I’m not a weak person; I’m an, “I hate bad weather” person. And that right there my friends is my true weakness (well that and Italian cold cut subs oh and donuts; well and hot dogs, I digress…).

I’m the girl who bitches at the wind. Oh yeah, the wind has heard my wrath many time. I’ve cried in the snow and rain. Maybe I need a T-shirt. I doubt I’m the only one. Fine, I’m the “Amateur Runner”, but maybe I need to organize us, rise up against the smug “Real Runners”, mention that they are the crazy sons-of-bitches and it doesn’t make them better than us and then I will challenge them all to a duel or maybe just some push-ups and see who wins. Then we’ll slap them with the pickle and dance on their limp pickle-beaten bodies. Who’s with me?

 


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About charmcityrants

Charm City Rants is written by Jeanne-Michele Vigna, a certified group fitness instructor, an avid traveler and seeker of knowledge, plus an expert of Eurovision and hot dogs. She lives in Baltimore with her husband and two cats. Plus, she obviously likes to complain.
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